Remedies

I'm fairly sick. It started as a throat tickle, and then got worse. Being that I have no health care, I have decided to not go to the doctor. Yes, yes, Sherlock, I know, my skills of deduction are improving. I'm such a good student, sir. Ahem.

Anyway... The general consensus was that I drink teas made with ginger and honey, and have garlic as well as copious amounts of whatever alcohol is near me.

I have gin, but I left it alone. I haven't really had a drink in days. Which is probably why i'm sick.

The first clove of garlic was horrible. The second made my mouth burn to such an extent that I felt like regurgitating and I ran my tongue under the sink. Cool refreshing water is a deceiver and does nothing for the harsh burn of raw garlic. After the third one, I was praying to God that this would work and I also presumed that I had died and was in fact, in hell.

I swigged Ginger honey tea, which was sweet, but began to burn the back of my throat, but i sortof liked it. It was the good burn, the raw garlic making me want to yell safety words, except that it was self inflicted.

I was told to bundle up and go to bed, and to quote a very good friend, "burn that shit out of you". I did not burn "that shit" but myself. I am now worse for wear. I think it actually made me worse.

I was given dayquil. It worked for about an hour. Then I got worse. A dear friend gave me three pills and said "HERE! Take this. Three is more than enough. You won't need more. If you do... well... then you're seriously sick."

So here is to the home remedy. In all my 28 years, it has never steered me wrong. And here is to a dead phone. I cannot call into work because the phone number is in the phone. And Here.... is to finally opening that gin.